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Princess
Gwendolyn黒崎
17
Her idiosyncrasy is an absolute copyright.
I'm a trashy teenager whom plays guitar,is into cosplay,loves trekking,a self claim author cum science geek and a drama princess.Arent I awesome? XD
The talk of the town
*Guitar
*Music is my intervention
*Romance books
*Travelling
*Having fun
*Intoxicated in her reverie
*Idyllic-ness
*Peaceful tranquil days
*Delirious
*Mates
*Pokemon!(you got a prob with it?)
*Doraemon
*Tons of other random cartoon.
Wish me a miracle
I don't give shit to what spammers think XD
The indelible words
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 Thursday, June 18, 2009  On the verge. @ 9:09 PM
Im beginning to judge my limits.
I really wonder if i can continue living life like this. Tuesday,I was totally wipe out by training.after doing warm up,my legs felt like jello and we ran a round around the school,i was ready to K.O and we still have to do 10 sets of running up and down the stairs,i totally cave after doing 4 sets.
Went to play the board game again and i felt really rotten.I was really afraid I'm draggin down the team with my uber weak stamina.Debrief till 7 and i went to meet my parents,ate and went home.
 I really <3>
Wed.
I was willing for time to pass faster so i could meet joanna.Was crapping with gmaine,snow and pohpoh on msn to kill time.Had UT and siannnnnnnnn~but after that i went to meet joanna!<3>
We ate at pastamania and head to westmall.Bought our tickets and went to toilet,then went in the theatres.I missed watching movie with her.
I felt really sensual inside the theatre.Remember that funny euphoric feeling when you watch a good movie?I had that,and i missed it so much i almost teared.Ever since I got into poly,my heart has built up a wall to prevent people from hurting me,cuz i really hate my classmates,not to mention when there arent emotions,you don't feel that tired out.
But i missed feeling feelings.I missed feeling oh so tender and that swell of sudden optimistic feeling.Havent felt this way in months.
I love Joanna.Really.I had to handle so much crap these few months,and i mean Crap.Not to mention my schedule is pack till i have no time to rest at all,Im seriously barely passing each week by mere gritted teeth charging.When I'm with joanna,it felt.....like me.
Like I havent went through any of these,that I was still the Gwen I was back then,she seem to have the ability to turn mysellf back,something that ive been struggling with for a month.Hanging out with Joanna felt really true,because she just want to be with me and have fun,whereas people around me are always expecting me to do something.I don't get it,no matter how busy we are,we still kept in contact,what about others?I sometimes really don't understand humans.
With that said,we head home and I felt lighthearted.I wished this feeling lingers on,forever.It doesnt matter that I reach home at 10 and didnt get any rest,it's being with people that I love that matters.I always make an effort.You?
Today~
I almost cried in class.My brain was bursting,it was weird,ytd i was still feeling really awesome and light headed but today,i was about to cave again.Talking to people seemed really troublesome,i'm starting to dislike it.I really hate it when people expects something of me,when i ask for something so simple,they tend to be self centered and push it away.I'm sick of this feeling.
Then there are also people who rushed me into stuff,then claiming they are going through a difficult time too.Please,I don't see you reaching home at 10 plus at night,I don't see you running and panting with your face drained of colours,I don't see you stressing over anything and instead,you are always at the comfort of your house.When i said im busy,and since you know my schedule,stop the fck of telling me what to do.I cant even handle my life properly now,so stop your selfish thinking,i will do what you want me to do when i have the time,period.
My head was hurting so bad just now and i didn't feel like going training.Seeing how I fare on tuesday turn me off so badly.I really dont wanna see my weak side physcially,when I see it mentally and emotionally for 2 months now.Vig then console me,trying to ignite the fire within me,and since i couldn't come up with a rebuttal,i went.
Snow came with me for a while,talking about music stuff and we went for training.Edward wasnt coming for training today,he came up to me and said, 'Eh gwen,today you happy,i not here to bully you.'
And my face automatically contorted to a puppy dog face.It felt weird that he wasnt there,the IG was suddenly so....quiet.... T.T
All we did was run today,ran everywhere around admiralty park.Even stopped by the monkey's place and had a good laugh.I was getting lethagic until the guys behind me,started tapping me and flicking me and accuse each other for doing it.Once i caught Jerral doing it and i chase him around,and eventually whack him on the head!Funny,it was almost they knew I was going to cave right there....
LEgs were aching like mad when i got back to school,was so thirsty I felt like my lips was going to shribble up and dropped unto the floor.But i was glad,i finished the run (:
Head back to the room,changed and stuff.Was a tweet disappointed no one's eating today,so instead,i only have Jerral to go back with me.Walking with him was weird,it was obvious we didn't have anything to talk about,the senior junior barrier was eminent.So we just talked about the upcoming trip and it lasted us all the way till the mrt station lol.
Truthfully,it was funny,he kept repeating that the seniors had tougher trainings and such in the past,but hearing his experience about the trips make me look forward to it tons.he said he used to be quite weak before he joined the IG,haha reminds me of myself actually.Lets just hope i can accomplish what he did when he joined. XD
The sky was awesomely beautiful while both of us were walking to the station. P.S Might be locking my blog again soon.Got time read my blog might as well talk to me right..... T.T
I wonder why
On this worrying night
I'm writing my feelings for you on paper
Perhaps...im just being whimsicalbut the number of sheets just keeps increasingIt would be nice if i had an equationfor calculating the probability that i love youmy sparkling and shining wisheshave mixed in with all the things i worry aboutthats right, i'll staple itonly at the beginning my feelings were lightbefore i knew it my passion grewand somehow staples cant go through anymore.
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Thursday, June 18, 2009 On the verge. @ 9:09 PM
Im beginning to judge my limits.
I really wonder if i can continue living life like this. Tuesday,I was totally wipe out by training.after doing warm up,my legs felt like jello and we ran a round around the school,i was ready to K.O and we still have to do 10 sets of running up and down the stairs,i totally cave after doing 4 sets.
Went to play the board game again and i felt really rotten.I was really afraid I'm draggin down the team with my uber weak stamina.Debrief till 7 and i went to meet my parents,ate and went home.
I really <3>
Wed.
I was willing for time to pass faster so i could meet joanna.Was crapping with gmaine,snow and pohpoh on msn to kill time.Had UT and siannnnnnnnn~but after that i went to meet joanna!<3>
We ate at pastamania and head to westmall.Bought our tickets and went to toilet,then went in the theatres.I missed watching movie with her.
I felt really sensual inside the theatre.Remember that funny euphoric feeling when you watch a good movie?I had that,and i missed it so much i almost teared.Ever since I got into poly,my heart has built up a wall to prevent people from hurting me,cuz i really hate my classmates,not to mention when there arent emotions,you don't feel that tired out.
But i missed feeling feelings.I missed feeling oh so tender and that swell of sudden optimistic feeling.Havent felt this way in months.
I love Joanna.Really.I had to handle so much crap these few months,and i mean Crap.Not to mention my schedule is pack till i have no time to rest at all,Im seriously barely passing each week by mere gritted teeth charging.When I'm with joanna,it felt.....like me.
Like I havent went through any of these,that I was still the Gwen I was back then,she seem to have the ability to turn mysellf back,something that ive been struggling with for a month.Hanging out with Joanna felt really true,because she just want to be with me and have fun,whereas people around me are always expecting me to do something.I don't get it,no matter how busy we are,we still kept in contact,what about others?I sometimes really don't understand humans.
With that said,we head home and I felt lighthearted.I wished this feeling lingers on,forever.It doesnt matter that I reach home at 10 and didnt get any rest,it's being with people that I love that matters.I always make an effort.You?
Today~
I almost cried in class.My brain was bursting,it was weird,ytd i was still feeling really awesome and light headed but today,i was about to cave again.Talking to people seemed really troublesome,i'm starting to dislike it.I really hate it when people expects something of me,when i ask for something so simple,they tend to be self centered and push it away.I'm sick of this feeling.
Then there are also people who rushed me into stuff,then claiming they are going through a difficult time too.Please,I don't see you reaching home at 10 plus at night,I don't see you running and panting with your face drained of colours,I don't see you stressing over anything and instead,you are always at the comfort of your house.When i said im busy,and since you know my schedule,stop the fck of telling me what to do.I cant even handle my life properly now,so stop your selfish thinking,i will do what you want me to do when i have the time,period.
My head was hurting so bad just now and i didn't feel like going training.Seeing how I fare on tuesday turn me off so badly.I really dont wanna see my weak side physcially,when I see it mentally and emotionally for 2 months now.Vig then console me,trying to ignite the fire within me,and since i couldn't come up with a rebuttal,i went.
Snow came with me for a while,talking about music stuff and we went for training.Edward wasnt coming for training today,he came up to me and said, 'Eh gwen,today you happy,i not here to bully you.'
And my face automatically contorted to a puppy dog face.It felt weird that he wasnt there,the IG was suddenly so....quiet.... T.T
All we did was run today,ran everywhere around admiralty park.Even stopped by the monkey's place and had a good laugh.I was getting lethagic until the guys behind me,started tapping me and flicking me and accuse each other for doing it.Once i caught Jerral doing it and i chase him around,and eventually whack him on the head!Funny,it was almost they knew I was going to cave right there....
LEgs were aching like mad when i got back to school,was so thirsty I felt like my lips was going to shribble up and dropped unto the floor.But i was glad,i finished the run (:
Head back to the room,changed and stuff.Was a tweet disappointed no one's eating today,so instead,i only have Jerral to go back with me.Walking with him was weird,it was obvious we didn't have anything to talk about,the senior junior barrier was eminent.So we just talked about the upcoming trip and it lasted us all the way till the mrt station lol.
Truthfully,it was funny,he kept repeating that the seniors had tougher trainings and such in the past,but hearing his experience about the trips make me look forward to it tons.he said he used to be quite weak before he joined the IG,haha reminds me of myself actually.Lets just hope i can accomplish what he did when he joined. XD
The sky was awesomely beautiful while both of us were walking to the station. P.S Might be locking my blog again soon.Got time read my blog might as well talk to me right..... T.T
I wonder why
On this worrying night
I'm writing my feelings for you on paper
Perhaps...im just being whimsicalbut the number of sheets just keeps increasingIt would be nice if i had an equationfor calculating the probability that i love youmy sparkling and shining wisheshave mixed in with all the things i worry aboutthats right, i'll staple itonly at the beginning my feelings were lightbefore i knew it my passion grewand somehow staples cant go through anymore.
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I'm the new drummer for your heartbeat.
Amanda
